Having suicidal ideations?

Perhaps you have a physical problem that manifested itself into an emotional problem. I advise you to seek medical help. See about talking to your pediatrician, first. Teenage depression is very common and you might need psychiatric help if all the correct question were honestly answered. I suffered from teenage depression way back in the day. I thought of suicide but it is such a cowardly act and no parent should have to bury a child, under any cirstances. Parents blame themselves and each other and tears families apart. My suggestion is to seek medical help first and foremost. I have lived almost 60 years and have seen suicide in the family, it was not honorable nor romantic. My nephew walk out into an oncoming train, made the NY Times because he tied up the commuter rush hour from southern NJ to Manhattan. Is that how you would like to be distinguished after you are gone? I think not. Hang in there, life will get better, you will have trials and tribulations but in the end you will be glad you hung around.